My damned wife and her shopping!
After her expedition to the Isle of Wight on Saturday there were, it seems, still a few things left on the island unpurchased, so she and my daughters decided to descend upon the unsuspecting people of the Isle and strip it bare of all goods that could be had for ready money. My son John was to go with them as a treat, or so my wife said, though an afternoon spent in the company of my wife and daughters when in a frenzy of shopping seems no treat to me.
I had the task of hoisting my wife and the girls into the bum boat for them to go ashore. I had the help of several strapping seamen for the not inconsiderable task of getting Mrs Hindmarsh lifted and settled. But when it came time for the girls to be placed in the boat I decided that I would do it myself (though the girls were keen for the sailors to hold them tight). Mary, and Jane were lifted and placed in the boat without difficulty and John was well able to get himself in unassisted. But when I lifted Susan one of the ropes gave way. Susan got a ducking and I fell from the side of the ship into the bum boat, receiving several bruises and a cut to my left knee.
Susan in tears and my wife fussing over her while the watching seamen showed all the signs of disrespect and even mirth at my discomfort. When I told my wife of my injury she brushed me aside with a "Don't be a baby!" and ordered me to take Susan back aboard the Buffalo and get her dry and warm.
I pointed out that I had ship's business to attend to, with the supplies and drinking water coming aboard before we sail tomorrow and mightn't it be better if she attend to to Susan so that I could do my job as Captain and promptly got an earful about this being the last shopping trip she would be able to make for years and did I intend to spoil the last few simple pleasures she could manage?
"And besides," she said in as dramatic a fashion as possible, "after the hell you have put me through of late with the Housekeeper the least you owe me is a shopping trip!"
Dear me. Life is a trial.
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